Disheartenment

[Music and Lyrics by HERR MORBID - Autumn/Winter 2001]

Lying in a dark corner 
The black candle light is dying out 
Trying to refuse this suffering 
As coldness burns my pale naked flesh 

I faced my fears a thousand times 
Endless doubts - Life of paranoia 
I try to find a way out 
From this state of suicidal urge 

I watch with empty eyes the blade 
As tears begin to fall down my face 
Another night alone with myself 
At one with melancholy and depression 

I bleed because the dark is near 
I cry as i realize you can' t be here 
I need to caress your skin in the night 
But now my only friend remains this knife 

Why must i live with these fears? 
I know my only tragedy is my mind 
Sometimes i think i'm wasting all the joys 
And with this bitter thought i fear to die 

I feel so jaded now, so far away 
I can't face next morning with this pain 
Another cut lacerates my flesh 
Sometimes i think it will be the last 

I'm only trying to objectivate this hate 
I prove towards myself and life itself 
I only need to watch these fifty wounds 
I opened upon my body in the night 

I only need to stop these sick death thoughts 
And cry for joy when you'll be here again 
I'll watch you sleeping naked at my side 
I'll kiss you and this blood will stop to flow 

Everyone can kill himself one day 
Life brings pain and suffering on our way 
Cut your wrists, it's simpler than it seems 
But in death you'll know... 
Disheartenment wins