If I Had $1,000,000

If I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars
Well, I'd buy you a house
I would buy you a houseAnd if I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars
I'd buy you furniture for your house
Maybe a nice Chesterfield or an ottomanAnd if I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars
Well, I'd buy you a K-Car
A nice Reliant automobile
And if I had a million dollars, I'd buy your loveIf I had a million dollars
I'd build a tree-fort in our yard
If I had a million dollars you could help
It wouldn't be that hardIf I had a million dollars
Maybe we could put a little tiny fridge
In there somewhere
We could just go up there and hang outLike open the fridge and stuff
And there'd all be foods laid out for us
Like little pre-wrapped sausages and thingsThey have pre-wrapped sausages
But they don't have pre-wrapped bacon
Well, can you blame them?
Yeah!If I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars
Well, I'd buy you a fur coat
But not a real fur coat, that's cruelAnd if I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars
Well, I'd buy you an exotic pet
Yep, like a llama or an emuAnd if I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars
Well, I'd buy you John Merrick's remains
All them crazy elephant bones
And if I had a million dollars I'd buy your loveIf I had a million dollars
We wouldn't have to walk to the store
If I had a million dollars
We'd take a limousine, 'cause it costs moreIf I had a million dollars
We wouldn't have to eat Kraft Dinner
But we would eat Kraft DinnerOf course we would, we'd just eat more
And buy really expensive ketchups with it
That's right, all the fanciest Dijon ketchupsIf I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars
Well, I'd buy you a green dress
But not a real green dress, that's cruelAnd if I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars
Well, I'd buy you some art
A Picasso or a GarfunkelIf I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars
Well, I'd buy you a monkey
Haven't you always wanted a monkey?
If I had a million dollars I'd buy your loveIf I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars
I'd be rich!